


DISHWHES.

by millygal



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Crack, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-13
Updated: 2017-04-13
Packaged: 2018-10-18 09:51:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 563
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10614444
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/millygal/pseuds/millygal
Summary: This is what happens when you change one of the world's deadliest hunters into a demon...He has time on his hands!





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is what happens when you change one of the world's deadliest hunters into a demon...He has time on his hands!  
> A/N: Thank you to stir_of_echoes for the read through and the encouragement. I call this therapy, for the both of us ;)

**Deadliest International Scavenger Hunt the World Has Ever Seen!**

Dean holds out the slightly wrinkled piece of paper, slow easy grin spreading across his handsome face as he reads aloud for Crowley's benefit, " _2014's list of Demon Activities. Winning team receives a year's free pass to the Playboy mansion and Heff's personal permission to indulge in whatever 'fun' ideas you can come up with._

_1\. Retrieve the still beating heart of a chaste/virgin nun.  
2\. Largest demon selfie shot in history-carnage optional-black eyes a must!  
3\. Show public support for your local senator...Whether that's a blood bath party in his honour or a fund raising drive...nummy treat favours of your choosing!  
4\. Topless photo shoot, at least three demons present, again, black eyes a must!  
5\. Turn two high ranking officials into your personal lapdogs...Toe licking optional._"

Crowley scrunches up his nose and holds out his hands, palms flat, "Stop, stop, I don't want to know anymore. Did you have anything to do with this? It's got Dean fucking Winchester written all over it!"

Dean carefully folds the already creased paper up and slips it in his back pocket before turning smug black eyes on the King of Hell, " ** _Maybe_** , it's not like you came through on the promise of entrails is it! The guys downstairs need a little pick me up!"

Crowley shudders and throws himself into the nearest chair, "But **group activities** , _really_ Dean...We aren't joiners!"

Dean raises an eyebrow, "Wait and see, we may surprise you."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

This is what happens when you decide it's a good idea to change one of the world's deadliest hunters into a demon. Crowley obviously didn't think this through, did he? Because here Dean stands, black eyes crinkling at the corners, smug smirk firmly fixed, standing over the crumpled body of what appears to be a virgin nun! Still beating heart dripping viscous fluid through his calloused fingers.

"Seriously Dean, did I in some way piss you off, I mean I understand the need to cause a little damage! New Demon-ness and all, but a virgin nun's heart?!? Could you not come up with something a little less cliched!"

"You're just pissed I got there first Kilt-Boy! Now hurry up and take the picture before this thing shrivels."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dean tugs sharply on Crowley's collar before urging the rest of the bedraggled group into some semblance of photo-ready, "Right gents, game faces on...one, two, three *click*"

Crowley shakes his head, trying to dislodge the bright white flashes going off behind his eyes and stumbles into the two demons flanking him, "Oi, watch it, King of Hell standing here!"

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~

"That doesn't count!"

Dean grins sneakily at Crowley and motions for Sammy to take his shirt off, "What doesn't count? He's been possessed by Lucifer and Meg, not to mention the demon bodily fluids still running through his veins... It counts!"

Sam smirks at Crowley's discomfort before chucking his sweaty shirt at the thoroughly annoyed King of Hell, "Come on Crowley, not afraid to get your kit off in front of little old me, are you?!?"

 

~~~~~~~~~~~

Standing amongst the heaving breasts and pouty lips, Dean takes a hold of his DISHWES Winner's Trophy, "Thank you thank you. I couldn't have done it without Crowley here. Let's give it up for the King of Hell. Reluctant participant in the world's first DISHWHES event!"


End file.
